Category Archives: Naomi Kramer
Posted by Ames
Linda’s had a bad day. First her boyfriend killed her. Then she woke up, still on this boring plane of existence, and with an odd obsession about her missing body. Mike won’t tell her what he did with her body, and she can’t find the stupid thing herself. There’s only one thing she can do – torment the bastard until he coughs up the information.
This is a very short work – novelette length.
Warning: Frequent foul language, mild sex scenes, and Australian spelling.
Published July 29th 2010
Read: 07 July 2011
A quirky and humorous story that although may seem stupid to some, I found quite entertaining. The language, especially Mike’s, had me thinking this was a short story set in Britain but was confused by the use of the $ sign. It’s Australian.
Linda’s methods of revenge as a ghost on her still living ex, whom she suspects killed her and has hidden her body, are ingenious and hilariously funny though as a person she’s incredibly annoying, at least from Trent’s, the paranormal private investigator she’s hired to find her body, perspective.
*Warning: much foul language, and if you’re squeamish there is cannibalism.
From Mike (Linda’s ex) POV
‘My hair’s blue, and my eyebrows are green, and my skin’s orange. I look like a smurf, a munchkin and an oompa loompa had an orgy and I was their love-child. Shit.’
They’re looking shocked, which scares me a little.
I look down. Fly’s unbuttoned, for a start. My dick’s waving hello in the breeze.
“God, sorry!” I say, putting him away and straightening myself up. “Rough night. Um…can I help you?”
One of them tears his eyes away from my pants and looks at my face, trying not to look fascinated by the fact that I’m still bright orange, I guess. My fingernails are still pink, so I must look like a freakshow even with my clothes in order.’