Category Archives: Charlaine Harris
Anyone up for some bloody fondue?
Check out the True Blood(y) fountain!
The beautiful Janina Gavankar, who plays Luna on HBO’s True Blood series, posted some wicked TB fountain pics on her website. She references two sites, which I checked, but one is in Italian. I ran the text through Google’s translator and it came up with this:
It was October of 2007, the Trevi Fountain was red around the web, some “time” talking about the fountains wrote bloody guerrilla marketing to promote the television series Dexter.
At a distance of 4 years back to talk of fountains that gush blood and specifically in the land of Dracula and Transylvania to promote True Blood ‘series focuses on the adventures of vampires in the fictional town of Bon Temps.
Gotta love it! That’s some serious series love right there!
In case you’re wondering what happened to my weekly True Blood recaps … the answer = RL got in the way! I’m behind on watching, so I haven’t had anything to recap. BUT, I know the Season 4 Finale, “And When I Die”, premieres this Sunday, 11 September on HBO. I’ll try to catch up quick, so we can chat next week about the finale and the season as a whole.
What do you think of this season? Lovin’ it? Left it? Share your thoughts with us!
So, who will die? Who will survive? And, for the love of Pete, who will Sookie pick? Has she kicked Bill to the curb yet? And, if not, WHY?!
Here are two clips to get ya pumped up for Sunday’s finale.
“I Wish I Was The Moon” ~ Song by Neko Case
Eric Gets Some Sookie Nookie!
Of course that is what sticks out in this episode for me. After Pam slipped the news that Eric is hiding out at Sookie’s place, Bill zips over only to catch them semi-nekked on the sofa. Eric immediately pops fang and attacks this Wimpy King. Sookie stops him from harming Bill telling him he’s his King. To which Eric drops to one knee and says, “My liege, forgive me.” Oi! Bill arrests Eric for being a threat, saying he’s being controlled by necromancers. He even goes so far as to ask for the Council’s approval for final death. Eric awaits his sentencing in a cell with Pam. When he walks in he says, “It smells like death in here.” Poor Pam!
Sookie begs Bill to let Eric go. She believes he’s doing this solely because he’s jealous of the two of them together. Bill delivers one of the season’s best lines when he tells her, “Believe it or not, my entire existence does not revolve around what or who is between your legs.” OUCH! He also tells his henchmen to arrest her if she ever steps foot on his property again.
Meanwhile in the cell, Pam reminds Eric, “Let me tell you a little something about King Bill: He is a self-loathing, power-hungry, pompous little dork, and you hate his guts.” When Eric won’t hear it, Pam gives it to him straight, like no one else can by saying, “Eric, snap the fuck out of it! You are a Viking vampire and a god and you bow to no one. If someone crosses you, you rip out their liver with one fang.”
Silver, Kingly stake in hand, about to deliver Eric’s sentence and Eric says, “Please tell Sookie I went to my true death knowing how to love, tell her thank you. I hope you two find your way back to each other.” Bill is taken aback by Eric’s statements and asks why he would say such a thing. Eric says, ” … she deserves happiness with whomever can give it to her.” Awwww. Now, kick his ass and get outta there! Thankfully, for reasons yet unknown, Bill lets him go and Eric finds Sookie wandering the woods in search of a traumatized Jason. Que the Marvin Gaye tunes …
“It’s like a werewolf, except a big-ass cat.”
No one can say Sookie doesn’t know her stuff. Very informative indeed. Jason’s freakin’ out because it’s the night of the full moon and he’s convinced he’s going to turn into a werepanther. When he tells Sookie, she promises to help him out, “And I’ll be here to help you any way I can. Other than shoot you in the head.” When he takes off into the woods, Sookie follows after him. She bumps into Alcide and Debbie, who have decided to run with the Shreveport pack, and asks them about werepanthers. Apparently, in TB TV, you cannot be turned by a bite, you are born a shifter – one or both of your parents must have shifter blood. Will Jason turn or not? Guess we’ll have to wait and see.
The Wee Wicked Firestarter
Arlene and Terry awake to a flaming house. Terry carries Arlene out of the house. She’s kicking and screaming about Mikey and all I kept wondering is … what about your other two kids? No worries – they were already outside safe and sound. Seems Mikey has a ghostly friend who must’ve helped him outta the house because the kids tell Arlene, he was just sittin’ in the yard with the freaky doll when they got there. When Sam asks if they are all okay, Arlene says, “The ghost of my serial-killin’ ex-fiance just tried to murder us in our sleep. We’re just peachy.”
Sam’s gotta deal with the mess, so he calls Tommy to let him know what’s up and asks if he can open Merlotte’s for him. Tommy agrees and proceeds to throw a self-hate pity party. During his tantrum, he morphs into Sam. Remember earlier in the season when Luna told the story about shifters being able to shift into any animal, even humans, if they kill a parent?
Tommy is all excited about trying out his Sam Powers. He prances around Merlotte’s, fires Sookie when she comes into the office asking for the day off (to deal with Eric business), chats up Maxine and POP! His bubble bursts when Maxine rants to Sam/Tommy about Tommy saying, “That boy’s dumber than a bucket of spit, and just as useful.” While back at Sam’s trailer, Sam/Tommy gets a surprise visit from Luna who undresses while telling him what a handsome, thoughtful and caring man he is. No post-coital snugglin’ here – Sam/Tommy kicks Luna out, tossing her dress at her, like she’s a $10 whore he picked up. Ooooh, Sam’s gonna pay for that one later!
Jesus and Lafayette are down in Mexico seeking a way to gain power from Jesus’ freaky Grandfather and his pregnant wife. Sitting around the table, they are given goat tongue for dinner. Yum! The look on Lafayette’s face was hilarious! Grandpa tells Jesus he doesn’t know what he wants, but if he can bring a sacrifice, he’ll think about helping him. Out in the fields, waitin’ for a sacrifice to “come to them”, Lafayette tells Jesus his Grandpa is crazy. Jesus keeps insisting they need the help. Their sacrifice ends up being a rattlesnake. Hokus Pokus, Mumbo Jumbo, POOF! Grandpa makes the rattler bite Jesus and locks them in the room. Lafayette is crying for help when some spirit floats into him and chants a healing prayer over Jesus. Guess Jesus lives because he’s hollerin’ at Lafayette in the next episode’s preview.
Look Who’s Coming to Dinner!
Tara’s lover, Naomi, shows up at Lafayette’s looking for her. Tara tells her why she went to New Orleans and changed her name. Basically, why she lied about everything. Naomi forgives her and they have some make up sex. Afterward, Tara takes her to Merlotte’s. While strolling through the parking lot, Pam shows up all pissed off and … I’m guessing by the preview clip that she snacks on Naomi causing Tara to go all vamp-hunter with Marnie/Antonia.
Ep. 43/Season 4, Ep. 7 ~ “Cold Grey Light of Dawn” Preview
“I had a bad dream.” ~ Eric
I had a dream … Godric was there
Our favorite 2,000 yr old vamp makes an appearance in Eric’s dream. This time Godric’s not the peaceful mentor, but the “you know you wanna drink her blood and be able to walk in the sun” type. He gets Eric all hot and heavy, fangs drop and he’s panting over Sookie when he awakes from his nightmare.
Still aroused from the dream, he wanders into Sookie’s room. She’s startled awake before he can take a nibble. Old Eric would’ve taken what he wanted, but Eric 2.0 goes Weepy Wendy and tells Sookie, “I had a bad dream.” He lays down with his head in her lap and cries bloody tears seeking comfort.
He says he’d never hurt someone as beautiful as her. He asks permission to stay with her, she agrees as long as he keeps his hands and fangs to himself. While they spoon, it’s obvious that his vulnerable new self is slowly, but surely breaking down Sookie’s “I’ll never be with Eric Northman” wall.
Tara pops over for some BFF support after her girlfriend finds some mail with her real name and address on it. Needless-to-say, Naomi is hurt to learn that “Toni” has lied to her. Sookie advises Tara to go to her now and fight for the girl she loves. She’s also trying to get rid of her before Eric saunters out of his cubby. Tara realizes something’s up with Sookie and before she can tell her, Eric walks into the room. Tara freaks out, screams and cusses at Sookie for housing such an evil vamp after all he’s done to her. When Tara leaves, Eric is once again saddened to learn that everything Tara said is true. And when the wall finally comes tumblin’ down, we get our moment … Eric and Sookie k-i-s-s-i-n-g! If you missed it, here’s a loop for ya.
I had a dream … I killed mama and papa
Tommy, still caught in Joe Lee’s choke collar, passes out – or so they think. Instead he jumps Joe Lee and wraps the chain around his neck trying to kill him. Mama’s none to happy and starts beating on Tommy begging him to stop. Joe Lee just won’t die – kinda like a cockroach – so Tommy grabs a pipe and beats him in the head until he’s dead, dead, dead. Only problem, mama got so angry and kept jumping Tommy, so he OOPS! kills her too.
In his panic, he packs them up in a van and heads to Sam for help. Sam helps Tommy wrap them and drives them to the swamp for gater bait. On the way, Andy pulls him over demanding to see in the back of the van. Tommy, grew a brain for 5 seconds and shifted into a gater to scare him off. The bodies, which are floating, are finally gobbled up by gaters when Sam tosses in some marshmallows because, “Gators love marshmallows. You should know that.” Umm, ok.
I had a dream … I f**ked Jessica and Hoyt was there
At the end of the last episode, Jason was found passed out on the side of the road by Jessica and Hoyt. Jessica feeds Jason some of her blood to help heal his wounds. They get Jason home in bed to rest and recover. Hoyt can sense something is up with Jessica, she’s being distant, but insists she’s just exhausted from being a blood donor. Hoyt, not buying what she’s sellin’, decides to stay with Jason for a bit. The brofriends have a chat about Jason’s Hot Shot “experience”. He tells Hoyt, in his best God-voice (actually sounded more like the movie trailer guy, but no less hilarious) “Jason Stackhouse, you have f**ked too many hot women. Now let’s see how you like it!”
Back at home, Jessica crawls up Jason and he’s quick enough to ask, “Is this a dream?” Jessica confirms and he puts a short stop to the seduction as he feels a pang of guilt over Hoyt’s love of Jessica, then he blows it off … it is a dream after all. While smexin’, she keeps calling out Hoyt’s name which is freaking him out, but nothing does that as well as Hoyt showing up on top of Jason which shocks him awake.
I had a dream … my face was falling off
Poor Pam! She shows up at Bill’s decked out in her best funeral attire, veil and all. He says, “Oh good, the world needs more beekeepers.” Best Bill line in a looong time. She is understandably pissed off and exclaims, “You f**k with my face, it’s time to die.” She demands that he “Convene your sheriffs so we can kill this uppity wiccan c**t … your majesty.”
He tells her that cannot be done, vamps cannot kill humans. Bill’s wicca spy meets with Marnie and Bill’s goons step in to “arrest” her. They lock her up in Bill’s state-of-the-art prison. He whammies her to find out exactly what she knows about the disappearance of Eric and how to reverse the melting spell on Pam. As we all know, she knows nothing. Pam and Bill meet with the other sheriffs in Louisiana to discuss the wiccan threat. Pam accidentally spills, in front of them all, that Eric has had his memory wiped. Bill demands to know everything she knows and where he is staying. Pam can’t resist his Kingly powers and tells him Eric’s at Sookie’s house.
I had a dream … Zzzzz I dosed off, what’d I miss?
Jesus convinces Lafayette to head to Mexico to visit Grandpa. Why? When Jesus was young, his grandpa gave him a goat. Little Boy Jesus was thrilled to have a pet, only grandpa had other plans. Demanding he kill the goat and take in his essence. When he did, he felt something so powerful …. he believes that power is what he and Lafayette need now to protect themselves from two vamps and a crazy ass witch.
Sookie listens in on Holly’s inner monologue and learns about the Moon Goddess Emporium. She heads over there and introduces herself to Marnie. When Marnie refuses to do a reading for her, she says, “When I was a kid, my two favorite TV shows were Sabrina and Charmed!” Marnie gives in and during the reading Sookie’s Gran shows up. Gran tells Sookie not to lose her heart to this boy, his situation is temporary. Then, she tells Sookie to stay away from this witch, she’s dangerous … RUN! Sookie thanks Marnie, telling her when her Gran tells her to run, she runs.
Arlene is freaked by the writing on the wall. Terry calls for some religious back up to cleanse the house of Rene’s spirit. Turns out the preacher he calls is Reverend Daniels and his wife, Tara’s Mom. They sing some songs and do some smudging around the house. Great line: Arlene says, “Smells a little like pot.” Terry responds, “Not really.” Convinced that took care of their problem, they have some satin sheet nookie and spoon. On the dresser, a matchbook lights and burns out on it’s own.
Alcide gets a visit from Shreveport’s pack master, Luna’s baby daddy. He tells Alcide he’s been in town long enough and should’ve registered with pack by now. Alcide’s decided to go it alone and tells him to buzz off. (In case you haven’t seen it, Alcide, in all his hot muscled glory, is sportin’ the cover of Muscle & Fitness’ July 2011 issue. The photos are hawt! It’s a MUST see!)
Portia just can’t take no for an answer and shows up at Bill’s with reasons why incest isn’t a good enough reason for the two of them to stop
f**king seeing each other. He puts the vamp whammy on her so that anytime she sees him she’ll want to run from the room screaming, which she does.
Check out the trailer HBO premiered at Comic Con! Looks like it should be an interesting season!
Ep. 42/Season 4, Ep. 6 ~ “I Wish I Was the Moon” Preview
With her knack for being in trouble’s way, Sookie witnesses the firebombing of Merlotte’s, the bar where she works. Since Sam Merlotte is now known to be two-natured, suspicion falls immediately on the anti-shifters in the area. But Sookie suspects otherwise and she and Sam work together to uncover the culprit – and the twisted motive for the attack. But her attention is divided. Though she can’t ‘read’ vampires, Sookie knows her lover Eric Northman and his ‘child’ Pam well – and she realises that they are plotting to kill the vampire who is now their master. Gradually, she is drawn into the plot -which is much more complicated than she knows. Caught up in the politics of the vampire world, Sookie will learn that she is as much of a pawn as any ordinary human – and that there is a new Queen on the board . . .
Hardcover, 327 pages
Published May 3rd 2011 by Gollancz
Read: 16 July 2011
**Warning: This review contains SPOILERS!**
It was all a dream! Sookie wakes up in a sweat freaking out only to realise it was all just a harmless nightmare. Her life isn’t a supernatural mess, she’s settled down with her man and is happily living in domestic bliss. The curtain comes down on the book.
That didn’t happen but I wouldn’t be surprised if it does, as a series closer that is. There was so much WTFery in Dead Reckoning it’s hard to know where to start. My feelings shifted through indifference, exasperation, WTH and the occasional chuckle.
Changing agendas and personalities of the characters over the last few books has left me lukewarm. Sookie is no longer someone I sympathise with. My exasperation came into play with what I perceive to be Sookie’s drawn out break up with Eric. It’s been on the cards for a while and many fans have predicted such a thing. Sookie thinking of her future and the impossibility of children with her current beau, his love of violence and her hatred of it plus his level of understanding of her feelings plummeting when the bond is severed has her reconsidering her options.
It seemed like Harris was throwing men at Sookie left, right and centre, offering them up as alternatives. Alcide’s weird Little Red Riding Hood move was both completely out of character and unexpected. Alcide has always been a gentleman and gentlemen simply do not take off their clothes and slip into a girl’s bed without her knowledge or permission when little more than polite words have passed between them in recent times -WTF? Creepy as hell.
Claude eyeing Sookie’s close friendship with Sam, her desperate run, whilst completely starkers, into dead-to-the-world Bill’s arms to hide from kidnappers -did she have to be naked? Did we have to be reminded of his love her and his willingness to get back together? Even her fae family were being offered up as possible love interests? Erm, incest anyone? I know Sookie’s Christian beliefs have had to stretch to accommodate her increasingly dangerous lifestyle but incest is probably pushing it.
The storyline was partly one that wouldn’t die. The death of Debbie Pelt which if I remember correctly was in book 4. This is #14. Debbie’s sister Sandra who’s one-track mind is hell bent on Sookie’s death -again, by any means necessary. The other part is how-to-get-rid-of-Victor. Digging up old storylines and rehashing them isn’t something I’m interested in, while the Victor-problem was much the same; someone seeks to control Sookie and friends and they must be eliminated, only the character to be disposed of has changed.
The introduction of a certain fae object is discomforting and leads me to believe what I’ve said in my opening paragraph is entirely possible. I really don’t want to know what Sookie will use it for, whether it be a selfish purpose or an altruistic one.
Claude, Dermot and the fae from Hooligans sparked my interest. I wished we could’ve seen more them and their plans. Dermot was sweet and I enjoyed his renewed vigor and sense of purpose.
I’m not so secretly hoping for a Hamlet ending -one in which everyone dies, including Sookie herself. I think that’s the only way to both shock readers who’ve predicted Sookie’s final situation and ensure the series isn’t somehow extended beyond an all ready long overdue point. I’m ready for Sookie stories to go the way of the dodo.
Catch Me, if You Can! Eric 2.0
Eric has always been my favorite character in the books and the show. And, in episode 4 we get to see more of Eric 2.0 or Amnesia Eric. At the end of episode 3, Eric sucked down Sookie’s Fairy Godmother, Claudine, like she was a cold beer on a hot summer day. POOF! The opener to this episode has Sookie scolding him for it, “You drank the whole fairy – Now go to your room!” When he goes for her neck, she stops him by screaming that he’d kill her. You can tell he really doesn’t want any harm to come to her or anyone else to have her for that matter.
I Feel a Love Triangle Forming and I Don’t Like It
Bill ~ Old news or just old? So far, he has his hands full with Eric’s mysterious disappearance following his “meeting” with the coven of witches and Portia. But, when he tries to force his way into Sookie’s house to look for Eric, she easily stops him by pulling the “You were the liar in our relationship, not me” card. Feeling guilty, he backs off. It’s obviously that if Sookie wanted him back, so he could have him. (Here’s hoping that doesn’t happen.)
Eric ~ His vulnerable underbelly is showing Sookie can’t help but feel something for the softer Eric who makes no attempt to hide his feelings. She’s used to him being cold, arrogant and taking what he wants. When he gets drunk off Claudine’s fairy blood, he zips around Sookie pinching her butt and playing “catch me if you can”. He runs off not caring the sun is about to rise. Sookie gets worried when, mid-afternoon, Eric still hasn’t returned home. She calls Alcide over to help sniff him out. When they find him, he hollers, “Hey Sookie! Where’ve you been? Come, come play with me, it’s wonderful here. I am Ægir God Of The See, and you are Rán, my sea goddess!” He’s splashing in the lake, looking like a childlike Neptune claiming he’ll slay all the sea monsters and stay there forever. “Gators, Crocodiles, show yourself! Cowards!” The fairy blood quickly wears off and he starts to burn.
When he returns to the house, while recovering from him sunburn, he tells her in a childlike voice, “Sookie, I hurt.”. (Here, baby, let me know rub some aloe on those burns. <– that's me, not Sookie – yet.) He knows that was his last chance to play in the sun. While moping in his room, he tells Sookie, “I’ll never swim in the sun again. Never feel the heat on my skin. Never see the daylight in your hair.” She tries to cheer him up, but it doesn’t work. He tells her, “If you kiss me, I promise to be happy.” She gives a half-assed, “No.” But, she wants to and was thiiiis close, I’m sure of it.
Alcide ~ Friends Friends my tush! My hubby’s eye brows shot up during their “friendly” hug. Didn’t look like “just friends” to him. He’s playing house with Debbie who is like a hand grenade with a loose pin. One wrong move – like, oops!, her smelling Sookie on you – and she’s gonna show you just how much she hasn’t changed. I’m ready for her to get dealt some more whoop ass.
Jealous Much: Alcide eavesdrops on Sookie’s talk with Eric and then Eric listens in on her talk with Alcide. My crystal ball tells me we might be seeing a “fanger” and “dog” fight between these two protectors.
When Cats Attack
Jason managed to talk his way out of the sexigoround in Hot Shot. While trying to flee, he makes like cat and climbs a tree to hide from Felton (who’s in panther form). Of course, being the Boy Scout that Jason is, he pulls out his handy pocket knife to shave a branch into a spear. With perfect aim, he jumps from the tree and stabs Felton, killing him in one smooth move. “Uncle Daddy” Felton becomes Season 4’s first to die a final death. Sayonara! When Crystal arrives on the scene, she’s quite happy to see Felton’s naked body lying dead at the foot of the tree. So much so that she kicks him and tells Jason they will now be Ghost Momma and Daddy, they can finally be together. Crazy much?! Jason, not wanting anything to do with her, stumbles off into the woods. Crystal tells him she’ll see him on the full moon. He finally collapses in the road where Jessica and Hoyt find him. Jessica feeds him some of her blood to help heal him. So, are we gonna see some smexy dreams between Jason and Jessica? She and Hoyt are on rocky ground as it is, this just might be the end of these two.
The Writing is on the Wall
Is Little Mikey another Damien?
Up until this episode, we’ve been lead to believe that Arlene is just a bit paranoid. That’s certainly not asking a lot, the chick can be a bit over the top. But, maybe her “my baby’s a demon spawn” fears are real? Left alone for less than a minute, Mikey gets hold of a marker and lets “Daddy” know “Baby Not Yours”. So, maybe Arlene was right this time.
I’m Melting …..
At the shop, Marnie, Jesus, Lafayette and Tara try to find a reversal spell. Lafayette screams at her, “You get her ass on the goddamn goddess line and you tell her to turn this curse a fucking round.” After searching through the shop’s tomes, one magically falls open to a spell that will work.
They all gather in the woods with Pam to try to break the spell on Eric. Pam, while still her snarky self, asks Marnie, “Are you fucking retarded?” when she can’t find her glasses, which are hanging on a chain around her neck. Apparently, the Wicca Witch can’t concentrate when everyone’s screaming ‘F*CK’. As Marnie starts the reversal spell the “Goddess” shows up and puts the whammy on Pam making her face peel off revealing the death inside her.
Oh, Pam. No, no, no! Never, ever peel your skin when it’s melting! Now, look what you’ve done!
Brief Stops in Snoredom
Nan scolds Bill for sending Eric after wiccans telling him, “Don’t fuck this up. How many retired kings do you know?” Looks like Bill’s gonna have to work for his crown. And, why do they keep mentioning his first kill as king? He didn’t kill anyone. He sent the dude off with his goon to do the killin’ (last episode).
Maxine stomps into Merlotte’s demanding Sam tell her where “her boy” has gone. No, not Hoyt, he’s “no son of mine”, she tells him when he plays dumb. Then, she goes all hypocritical and blasts him for ignoring his brother.
Bill and Portia are at Granny Bellefleur’s house reviewing the family tree (good times!) when Eric realizes Portia is his great-great-great-great granddaughter. He kicks her to the curb and drops the bomb as to why.
Sam makes a surprise visit to Luna’s house and pops in for some quality Barbie playtime with her daughter. He’s surprised to find out she has a daughter, but not enough to “run away”. So, Luna drops bomb #2, her ex and baby daddy is a werewolf. Bomb #3, he’s also a bit of a stalker. Nice! Way to go, Sam! His luck is almost as bad as Jason’s.
Tommy reconnects with his Mama who is thrilled her boy has got himself some edumacation and learnt how ‘ta read. He came back because she told him she finally left Joe Lee. Surprise! She lied. Tommy ends up with a choke collar on, held by Joe Lee who’s plannin’ to teach him some obedience. Can someone PLEASE tell me why he didn’t shift into a bird and fly away?!?
Ep. 41/Season 4, Ep. 5 ~ “Me and the Devil” Preview
Episode 3 felt like it should’ve been called “The Land of the Lost”
What was lost? For one, my hope that the TV show would follow the books. I need to let go of the connection and remind myself that the show is only loosely based on Harris’ Southern Vampire series. Shouldn’t have to keep reminding myself – the changes are obvious and numerous, but I keep a hopin’. Then, I have my husband asking each week, “Did that happen in the book?” Nope, nuh-uh, suuure didn’t. I finally asked him after this episode, “As someone who hasn’t read all the books, what do you think of this season so far?” His response was, “It’s good.” I think many people would agree. Me …. I’m still workin’ on that separation thing. But, I’m tryin’.
Eric ~ Memory Loss
Poor baby has lost his memory. Not entirely though, he does remember seeing people in a circle, a woman who was someone, but not with strange eyes who chanted and took everything that he was from him. Sookie took pity on him when she spotted him wandering shirtless down the side of the road. What girl wouldn’t have done the same? Eric, who somehow lost his shirt between the coven meeting and the road, all vulnerable and polite – how many chances are you gonna have to experience that Eric? She’s allowing him to hide out in her house, which he eventually learns he owns. Pam tells Sookie she must keep Eric hidden, no one must know he’s there. She believes Bill sent him to the coven with the intent of getting rid of Eric. Best bit: Eric gets embarrassed by a premature fang pop. Too funny!
Jason ~ Loss of Will
Jason, Jason, Jason … this boy never fails to end up in the worst situations. Not only did Crystal chow down on him in order to turn him into a panther who can breed with her, but they’ve got a line of Hotshot twat lined up for him to impregnate as well. Dose him with some Mexican Viagra and he’s up for the task, like it or not.
Sheriff Andy ~ Loss of Control
Andy’s V addiction causes him to lash out at Sam. He can’t get a hold of Jason and has zero willpower when it comes to V. He’s gotten his hands on another bottle (last episode) and can’t stop dippin’. Who knows what Andy will do next.
Tara ~ Loss of Peace
Tara returned to Bon Temps all peace, love and happiness after spending time away in New Orleans with her girlfriend. She’d only been back in town for 2 hours when Eric tried to take a bite (last episode). She’s had it with this crazy town. But, she hangs around anyway, mainly because she’s worried about what Lafayette will do. Lafayette is convinced that Eric will come after him after spotting him in the coven meeting. He’s terrified and heads to Fangtasia to beg his forgiveness. Only, he doesn’t know that Eric doesn’t remember. Tara blasts into Fangtasic with a wooden bullet loaded gun demanding Pam let Lafayette go.
Bill ~ No Love Loss
Portia Bellefleur boldly tells Bill that since he’s the most powerful vampire in town and she’s, well, Portia, they should think about adding sex into their relationship. Whoa is me Bill, with his heart which too old to love, tells her that he cannot love her, but he’s fine with the idea of becoming friends with benefits.
Jessica and Hoyt ~ Short-Term Memory Loss
Jessica chats with Bill about her snack over at Fangtasia (last episode). Bill tells her it would be best if Hoyt heard it from her instead of someone else. So, she gathers up her nerve, heads home and tells Hoyt she fed on someone else. He can’t stand that “when he kisses her it’ll be someone else’s blood he’ll taste.” He grabs the car keys in an attempt to leave, but she puts the vamp whammy on him making him forget what she said, telling him she loves him and only him. He’s all smiles and hugs … until he finds out the truth – probably from someone else. And … what is up with the busted up zombie baby doll? It was seen first in a room in Hoyt & Jessica’s new house.
This episode Hoyt asks Jessica what’s up with the doll. Supposedly, he’s tossed in the trash and she’s tossed it in the river. But, it’s back again. Freeeeaky! Jessica thinks she’s finally gotten rid of by giving the doll to Baby Mickey as a gift. No doubt that freaky doll will make another appearance.
Sam and Tommy ~ Loss of Respect
Tommy answers the door when a prospector comes callin’ at Ms. Fortenberry’s house about natural gas. He finds out that she’s sittin’ on a goldmine. Tommy heads to Merlotte’s to tell Sam what he found out. He wants them to buy her house and land, then split the money earned. Sam is appalled at Tommy after what Ms. Fortenberry has done for him and demands either Tommy tells her or he will. Of course, the meeting ends with Tommy yelling how much he hates Sam. Guess their broship won’t be gettin’ repaired as quickly as they’d hoped.
Debbie ~ Loss of Bad Girl Britches
Sookie went to Alcide’s place to ask for help “caring for Eric”. (Guess she didn’t take Pam’s warning about Eric’s safety too seriously. Or felt like Alcide would just know to keep that bit of news to himself.) While there Debbie pops in all Suzie Homemaker with a tray of snacks. She tells Sookie how sorry she is for what she did to her, asks her forgiveness, telling her she’s clean and sober. I didn’t like Debbie in the books, I didn’t like V’d out Debbie screamin’ about poor ‘ole Cooter. But, I definitely don’t like Martha Stewartish Debbie any better. Snore. Move on, Alcide! Girl’s trouble no matter what form she takes.
Sookie ~ Loss of Fairy Godmother
Yep! Claudine is no more. She stopped by Sookie’s place ordering her to leave with her immediately. Sookie basically told her to beat it. Before she could argue or leave, Eric zips over and sucks the poor fairy dry. Good to the last drop, apparently. Sookie exclaims, “You killed my fairy godmother!”
Ep. 40/Season 4, Ep. 4 ~ “I’m Alive and on Fire” Preview
“You Smell Like Dinner” had some great one liners!
And, ended with Amnesia Eric!
I wouldn’t say that episode two was fantastic. But, it definitely managed to reignite some of my excitement which was turned to a pile of ash by the premiere. Here’s hoping that wasn’t a fluke.
When the episode begins, Sookie’s none too pleased with Eric’s plan to “own her” by buying her house while she was off flittin’ with the fairies. Eric tells her the power she held over him (and his entrance into her house) is over. When she asks what he wants from her, his response, “Everything.” sums it up. He tells her that her blood tastes like freedom, “like sunshine, in a pretty, blond bottle.” He’s offering her protection from others when they find out about her fairy heritage. He bought the house to protect her, he could take her blood whenever he wanted, but he’s asking her to be his. *melt* Sookie, being as stubborn as she is, tells him she can never be with Eric the way she was with Bill. Oh, you silly, silly girl. He says he knows her …
“There are two Sookie Stackhouses. One clings to the idea that she’s merely human and the other who’s coming to grips with the fact that you are better than that.
Sookie asks, “And what do you think is gonna happen when I do come to grips with it? Do you think my legs are just gonna magically open for you?”
“Well, that was saucy. Must’ve been fairy Sookie talking. I like when she comes out.”
“And, I’m already sorry I said it.”
“Don’t be. The more you let her speak for you, the more likely you are to go on living. And, you want to live don’t you?”
“Well, then, I hope to hear from you girls soon.”
Sookie runs to King Bill’s to see if there’s anything he can do to help get her house back. Even as King, Bill knows “Eric has friends in high places” and the chances of him relinquishing the house are slim to none. She’s not very happy that the new King isn’t able to help her out. But, then Sookie always expects Bill to come to her rescue. Will that ever change?
When Bill is no help, she heads to Fangtasia to talk to Eric. He’s not there when she arrives, so she decides to hang around and wait for him to return. When Pam tells Sookie that Eric cares for her in his own way. Sookie says she doesn’t care.
Sookie: “I will never be Eric Northman’s puppet.”
Pam: “Shame for you, then. He pulls good string.”
The Making of a King
Surprised to see Bill was King of Louisiana? Me too! Through several flashbacks, we find out that punk-rocker Bill was approached in 1982 London by Nan Flanagan. She’s noticed that Bill doesn’t kill his food and tells him he they are preparing for the day when vampires go public with their existence. She wants him to spy and infiltrate the monarchies. We assume he agreed to help her because in the next flashback we see Bill fighting Queen Sophie-Ann. Instead of having his ass handed to him, she gets shot up with wooden bullets by Nan’s black leather brigade of soldiers who were hiding in the wings to help Bill win. Since Bill has done as she’s asked and the Queen is dead, Bill is now the King of Louisiana.
Cat Scratch Fever
Oh, Jason. Poor baby just can’t win. Last week, while delivering food to the wildlings in Hot Shot, he found himself locked inside a freezer. This week, he wakes up chained to a mattress with Timbo licking his head wound.
“It’s not that I don’t appreciate all of the lickin’. ‘Cause I do. But I’m more of a Band-Aid kinda guy.”
He’s so happy to see Crystal, until she tells him that she and Felton are there to make a baby. Jason is confused by the point of having Felton there, since he won’t be participating in the lovin’. Crystal laughs it off saying that in order to ensure they have a panther, they have to turn him first. Strapped down and helpless, Jason finds himself becoming a meal for the two panthers.
Lookin’ For Love
Sam is attracted to Luna, the sexy shifter who’s a teacher by day. He tells her it’s okay to open up with him. She’s a bit reluctant at first, but eventually tells the group that she’s 1/2 Mexican 1/2 Cherokee. Her mom died while giving birth to her. Her dad believed that skinwalkers were evil witches who could take the form of any animal. ANY animal, meaning humans too. She took the form of her mother. The group is understandably shocked by this, but you can tell Sam feels sorry for the girl who lost her mother and happy she’s decided to share with the group.
Tommy sneaks up on the meeting and wants back in Sam’s life. He doesn’t hide the fact that his leg is in fact fine. Sam tells him that they don’t trust each other. But, Tommy wants his brother back, so they agree to try and distrust each other a little less each day.
The Honeymoon is Over
Jessica and Hoyt are stopped by protesters when trying to leave Fangtasia. Hoyt gets into a fight with one of the protesters. And, when one of them calls Jessica a vamp whore, she flashes some fang and dares him to say it again.
Pam is there to keep Jessica from doing anything the vamps will regret and tells them to head home.
Let these good people practice their constitutional right to be fucking idiots.
When Jessica wakes up the following evening, she offers Hoyt some of her blood to heal his injuries. He says he doesn’t want any, she gets offended. He tries to reassure her by saying he’s seen a lot of people get messed up from too much vampire blood. She’s not buying it. She takes the truck and instead of heading to the store as she said, she turns right and heads to Fangtasia. There she finds the cutie fangbanger from episode one and takes him to the bathroom for a snack. When she’s busted by Sookie, she tells Sookie she didn’t like her acting like her step-mother when she was with Bill and she likes it even less now.
“I can eat who I want!”
Do you think it’s cheating to “eat” others? I’m sure Hoyt will! But, we have to remember, Jessica is only 17 and already in a committed relationship. Can’t be easy.
Warning: Necromancers in Bon Temps
Jesus and Lafayette are heading out to another meeting when Tara shows up. She’s come back to Bon Temps to see Sookie. She agrees to go along with them to the meeting.
Lafayette: “We got a thing.”
Tara: “A gay thing?”
Lafayette: “A Wiccan thing.”
The wiccans are thrilled by what they were able to accomplish in their last meeting. Now they want to raise a human. Lafayette and Tara want nothing to do with it.
Bill’s spy tells him that the coven was able to raise a bird from the dead. This frightens Bill because “if they can control the dead, they can control vampires.” He orders Eric to take care of it.
When Eric pops into the meeting to demand they disband, Marnie goes into one of her trances and starts chanting in Latin. She tells everyone to join hands. Initially, Lafayette doesn’t want to take part, but he’s scared to death of Eric, so he gives in and WAM! Chant + Lafayette in circle = Amnesia Eric
True Blood.net has tried to translate the chant and here’s what they found:
Jam tibi impero et præcipio maligne spiritus! ut confestim allata et circulo discedas, absque omni strepito, terrore, clamore et foetore, asque sine omni damno mei tam animæ quam corporis.
Translation: Evil spirits, I command you to depart the circle immediately, without sound or fear or foulness, and without damage to either my soul or body.
A dazed and confused Eric zips out of the shop. Marnie “wakes up” following her chant not remembering what happened. The next time we see Eric he’s wandering down the road, shirtless. Sookie pulls up in her car and tries to talk to him. He doesn’t recognize her at all. But, a nose knows.
“Why do you smell so good?”
Let the Good Times Roll!
I am excited to see how Ball and his TB clan handle the amnesia storyline. It’s a fan favorite from Dead to the World, book 4, by Charlaine Harris. That could prove to make it a storyline they stick to closely or they could choose to revamp (no pun intended) it altogether. Only time will tell.
Preview Clip for Ep 3 “If You Love Me, Why Am I Dyin’?”
“She’s Not There” starts Season 4 off
with a plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh … WTH?!
I know I can’t be the only fan of the books and the show who was left wishing we could throw something heavy at the ending credits without destroying our sweet big screen TVs. HBO’s “First 8 Minutes” clip really should have been my clue, if the first 8 minutes didn’t wow me, the rest of the episode wouldn’t either. But, no, I went into it with high expectations and a big bowl of popcorn. Didn’t take long for my expectation bubble to burst and my floor to be covered with popcorn. (Figured it was safer to throw popcorn at the screen instead.)
As shown in the first 8-minutes clip, Sookie is transported to Freaky Fairyland by Claudine, who tells her that she’s her fairy godmother. There she runs into telepathic bellboy, Barry, from Texas and long-lost Grandpa Earl. Grandpa believes he’s been hangin’ with the fairies for only a week, not twenty years. Sookie alone realizes something’s not right and refuses to eat the magic mangoes. Good thing too (phew, that was really close) because Mab announces that they are done mixing and “now it is time to harvest”.
Mab tries to force Sookie to eat, when BLAM! Sookie uses her super powers to throw her back into a tree. (And, tell me, how IS that possible? Sookie’s been eating her magic Wheaties, I guess.)
Go Claudine! Sookie tells Claudine, “If your job is look after me, can I just say, you suck?” And Claudine points out, “Well, you’re still alive, aren’t you?” (I’m sure she’s thinking, “Why, you ungrateful, trouble-seeking, vamp-loving, little …”)
Claude helps Grandpa Earl and Sookie jump to safety, where boo-hoo, Grandpa poofs into nothing (shouldn’t have eaten all those magic mangoes), but not before leaving his pocket watch behind for Jason. When Sookie gets home, she finds the house being remodeled. The first person she sees is Jason, who’s bustin’ out of his copper’s uniform, literally, and can’t believe she’s alive. Turns out Sookie wasn’t gone for minutes, but 12½ months!
And now, the best and worst of the rest
Best: Eric and Bill zip over to Sookie’s and start in with “I missed you” and “No, I missed you more” when we learn, from Bill’s order for Eric to go, that Bill now has authority over Eric. But, before leaving, Eric tells Sookie, “Understand this, everyone who claims to love you, your friends, your brother, even Bill Compton, they all gave up on you. I. Never. Did.” (Ahhh, my heart’s all a flutter.)
Worst: Andy shows up and immediately starts screaming about all the time and money he’s spent over the last thirteen months trying to find her. Bill offers to reimburse him for the costs, provided he clear his name for Sookie’s (presumed) murder. Does that calm Andy down? Only for a split second, then he starts in on how mad he is for losing a crime-free county plaque to Webster Parrish. Andy’s not himself lately, ya see. He’s gotten himself hooked on V but good. Seems Jason has become Andy’s conscience.
Best & Worst: Jesus and Lafayette are still together. Yay! But, now Jesus is trying to pull him into his coven meetings. Lafayette agrees to stay for “five minutes. Ten, if they got dranks.” Seems he’s found the spot where “old air fresheners go to die”. That’s not all, Marnie, head of the wiccans gathered, calls forth the spirit of Eddie and offers him a rose. Understandably, Lafayette freaks, gets pissed off at Jesus, thinking he’s told them about his past, and scurries on outta there. Later, while they are reconciling, Jesus talks him into giving it one more chance. He agrees, only this time, he becomes part of Marnie’s attempts to resurrect her dead bird, Manerva. When the rising is successful, mainly because of Lafayette’s participation, Marnie is thrilled with the possibilities. (Poor Lafayette. Of course, one of the things I really like about the show is that he’s still alive to be in it.)
Best: Arlene comes home to find baby Mickey surrounded by a bunch of Barbie heads. The sight just adds to her conviction that the baby of her dead ex is evil. (She plays freaked out well.) Terri, bless his heart, tries to convince her that he’s just doin’ what boys do, no harm, no foul. While Arlene tries to explain to her infant that “killing is wrong”.
Best: Jump to New Orleans where we find Tara cage fighting like a master UFC fighter. Is it a surprise she wins? Nope! Gotta love that smile! She always did have a lot of pent up anger. Least she’s found a constructive way to release all that hostility. Seems becoming Toni has not only offered her some much needed anger release, but some sexual release, of the lesbian variety, as well. (Didn’t expect that!) Go, Tara!
Best: Back in Bon Temps, Hoyt comes home to Jessica and chews her out for never cooking him dinner. She reminds him that vampires do not eat food.
“Do you understand how gross human food is to a vampire? It’s all dead. Permanently, forever dead. Going to the Piggly Wiggly for me feels like going to the morgue for you.”
“You think bleeding out into your mouth wasn’t gross for me at first? You get used to it.”
Hoyt insists it can’t be all that hard for her to make him some eggs now and then. So, she agrees, throwing it all together, shells and all, into a sloppy mess which he tries to eat. They both laugh it off and eventually apologize, promising to do better.
FAVORITE SCENE: Pam sits in her pink business suit delivering lines about how humans have nothing to fear from vampires, but she’s a bore according to Nan Flanagan, the face of the American Vampire League. “It’s a post-Edgington world, people!” Pam’s a hoot though with her lines, “Everyone’s welcome. Come on down. The blood’s warm and so is the service.”, delivered in that I-could-give-a-shit kinda way that she does best. Eric takes the clip mic and delivers the perfect PSA.
“Good evening, ladies and gentleman. My name is Eric Northman. I’m a tax-paying American and small business owner in the great state of Louisiana. I also happen to be a vampire.”
“We’re always more than happy to serve humans here at Fangtasia, and I don’t mean for dinner.”
Meanwhile, Bill is at the dedication for the Caroline Compton Senior Citizens Center where “He’s grateful to honor his wife …”.
WORST: Sam’s brother, Tommy, has, at some point, taken up with Hoyt’s crazy mama, Maxine Fortenberry and is milking Sam for physical therapy for his leg. (Sam shot Tommy for stealing from him in the finale.) When Tommy and Maxine come to Merlottes he’s all clean-shaven and praying before their meal. When Sam asks how the PT he’s paying for is going, Tommy shoots back asking how Sam’s anger management is going. Sam’s “anger management” group is two new chicks, one named Luna and a dude named Emery. Turns out they are all shifters with “high cortisol levels”. They decide to strip down and head out for a nightly run … as horses.
SNORE: Sookie has hired a lawyer, Andy’s sister, Portia Bellefleur, to help her contact AIK, the company that bought her house. She’s looking to buy it back.
SNORE: Jason, left in charge of the wildlings over in Hot Shot in the finale, heads over with some grub. While there, he’s lured into taking a look at the icebox. One of the kids pushes him in and locks the lid. (Seems it’s true … no good deed goes unpunished.)
“She’s Not There” could refer to the fact that Sookie is “not there”. She’s in less than 1/2 of the scenes in this episode as we catch up on what everyone’s been up to while she’s been off in Fairyland.
As I’ve watched the show for the past several years, I’ve tried very hard to separate Harris’ books from Bell’s show. That’s not always an easy task. It seems that every year I’m ecstatic about the new season premiere and, without fail (Thank you, Mr. Bell), I’m always pissed by the end of it. Why is that? Is it just me? I’m tellin’ ya right now, they had better do justice to Eric and his witch-induced amnesia or …. I want to say I’ll stop watching. I really do. But, damn it all, Alexander Skarsgård is just too yummy to pass up. I’m so weak.
For a show that’s been known to shock and awe with it’s nudity and in-your-face sex scenes, this episode was rather tame with a couple of brief scenes with Tara/Toni and her lady love. Called “chocolate vanilla swirl” by a drunk ass in an alley, it proved to be one of the episodes biggest surprises. She’s finally taking charge of her life, living it to the fullest. It’s nice to see Tara not bitching and complaining for once.
Another surprise, after, presumably, besting the Queen, Bill is now the King of Louisiana. Reclining in his posh office as he receives a visit from Katie, “Ms. Pellum”, one of the members from the coven, who is obviously spying for him.
Finally, Sookie is changing for bed following a shower when she tosses her robe over her shoulder (who does that?!) and it doesn’t land on the floor, but in Eric’s hand. Upon seeing her nekked, he says what every girl would love to hear.
Hmmmm. *shiver* Such a strange sensation when reality matches what you pictured in your mind so precisely.
He reveals he’s the one that bought her house. When she asks why, he says, “Because I always knew you were alive. And, if I own the house, well, then I would own you. Sookie. You. Are. Mine.” *jealous*claws pop out*
PS: Did anyone else, but my OCDemoness, notice it when Sookie moves her bed a little to the left to center it under her frames?
Alright, Blood fans, the premiere of Season 4 is almost here!
And, to get us ready, HBO has released a “True Blood in Under 5 Minutes” vid recapping the first 3 seasons.
There are also mini recaps for each of the main character’s cliffhanger from the last episode of S03
(Each mini-vid is about 25-30 seconds in length; click the links below to watch them @ YouTube)
☞ Sookie heads off to fairyland
☞ Bill takes on the Queen
☞ Sookie boohoos as she boots Bill out of her house and Eric sees it as his chance to have her to himself
☞ Crystal and Jason say their teary goodbyes; he says he’ll “do anything to find Crystal”
☞ Sam and baby bro are in the woods; Sam’s tracked him down and “takes control of his future”
☞ Tara‘s “done being a victim” and drives off
☞ Lafayette learns Jesus is a witch; he’s not sure now if “all this darkness in his family” is a curse or not
☞ Hoyt and Jessica are in their new house when he pops the question